Attempt at short story

I am a bird. I am supposed to fly breath and discover a freedom that is so unfamiliar to the rest of us that you can’t even begin to understand the weightlessness I feel. But somehow you have not been to grasp that you cannot control me, you cannot cage me, but you feel as though you can. We have played this game of cat and mouse for a while, you think you can outsmart me, challenge me. You have, challenged me, for I will evade you, deceive you. This time I have won and now I have ended up in a dark hole. I am now alone waiting to fly again and be free but I can’t find my way out. There is a lake or it looks like a lake but it when I try to walk across it reaches up and grabs my foot and holds me. It pulls me down so I can go down and play with him and I can’t break free from him. So it seems this is my fate to go underneath and be trapped once again, in a world I don’t feel I necessarily belong. This world is different, it’s darker, and reeks of death. It is almost unnatural for a place to look like this and to be able to assume that there was once life or there’re is currently people living in such a wretched place. The ground shakes uncontrollably as if, it too, is ashamed that someone other than its own has to witness such a place, it brings a shiver in my spine and I feel my spine stiffen and crack. Looking up there is a whole and light shines through and washes my face and I taste a beautifulness that I almost forgot about. I need a way out, until I move and I realize he has changed me to floor so salvation seems unreachable. I will escape, I have to escape from a life in which I struggle to survive and continue on and die in death. It seems that he has taken pity on me, for he releases the chains but closes the whole, so we are back to the game of cat and mouse.What is wrong with society? Why are there duties that it seems I have to fill? Why can’t I be free to discover life? Why does it seem the life weighs more than death and the only escape is life? The only escape for me is freedom, the room to breathe and somehow something will chain me, trap me in a dungeon andsomehow I will break free and I will continue to fly and escape societal duties. For these will not hold or bind me, all chains can be broken or untangled. I am a bird and freedom is place of opportunity and discovery of both all the beauties and joys that the world has to offer after my escape from the dark and broken world that has so tried to suck me in.

Look the characters and beauty

Oh Clarissa, somehow she manages to turn the world inside out. In the heart of New York City, the old woman manages to find the small happiness the “endless, harsh punishments” and she stands out amongst it all. At 52 she might as well have been 22 because there is no denying her youth and liveliness. The chapter is named Mrs. Dalloway but that isn’t even her real name, her name is Clarissa Vaughn and she got the name “Mrs. Dalloway” from Richard. Richard assumed that because she was such a wonderful lady she didn’t need something plain and simple as “Vaughn” for it didn’t suit her. No, what she needed was something that would have people remember her, a name that had merit such as Jane Eyre, Isabel Archer, and Ana Karenina, great female figures in literature that represent independence, femininity, and strength, because even at 52 Clarissa was all of those things; love, independence, and strength. Clarissa was given a gifted fate, she was destined to happiness and love and success not disaster and failure. Where Clarissa was imaginative Richard was practical or seemingly obtuse he preferred wit (which we can connect to scenes in Hamlet where, Hamlet uses his wit and play on words to show superiority over others, such as Polonius when they have their little word war). Richard tells Clarissa “Beauty is a whore, I like money better.” Beauty and whore seem to be contrasting ideas, when one thinks of beauty they think of something alluring or something that captures the mind of people; captivating. The literal definition of beauty is “something that is appealing; an intense pleasure or deep satisfaction to the mind.” When you think of a whore you think of a woman who has lowered her standards, degraded herself. The words dirty, seller, worthless, rascal come to mind but when one thinks of beauty you stop ponder, consider, take in, observe, enjoy. The ideas contrast then bring in the concept of money. Money is “ a type of currency used to cover the costs of goods or services.” They tie in with each other. Could we not see money as beauty? Is Richard trying to tell Clarissa to be more practical and realize that beauty is overrated and worthless and dirty, and that money, something that could take something beautiful and turn into a “whore” by turning it into something filthy and dirty, more practical? Or is he just witty? Being sarcastic to show how people no longer focus on beauty because they think it is overrated and perverted, so they settle for something that is supposed to be less perverted and clean like money, which can eventually consume a person turning them into something that could be considered dirty and filthy when greediness has taken over. There’s the part of Clarissa that too feels sluttish and dirtied, she tries and appreciates the days (beauty ) but feels herself to be the “sluttish widow” stuck in the triangle of her Louis and Richard. She is now the “money” which could be used for beauty and prosperityin the right hands but then in the wrong hands could also be considered dirty and filthy.

Body in the water

“The Hours” by Michael Cunningham is an interesting book; or rather the prologue is very interesting. It was slow at first but then you’re a little confused with what is going on because there is just so much detail, you feel as though you are standing at the edge of the bank, but still at a distance, watching the curiosity and the crinkled concentrated lines on her forehead slowly flatten out and peace and calm take over her features. You notice how she looks around questioningly and you watch with curiosity as she searches around the beach and she finds one stone that is “roughly the size of a pig’s skull (4).” You watch her approach the bank noticing how the water is actually a murky and disgusting yellow rather than the ugly brown, although in my personal opinion the yellow is worse. Dirty yellow just shows a more murky filth, tainted, or disturbed. As you ponder the disgustingness of the water you see Virginia start to walk towards the water, walking inside it with her shows still on and the water coming right up underneath her knees and you want to yell at her, tell her to come out but just as you’re about to you realize just how peaceful she is and how there is really no one who could really stop her at this moment so you pause and let her continue. For a moment you are at peace with her and then she is in the water and you don’t really pay attention because you figure that she can just swim back, but she doesn’t; she lets the current take her and she flows away and you don’t think that about that being the last time that you are going to see her, but it is. Cunningham has this way of writing where you feel as though you are standing near Virginia as she commits suicide, but then at the same time you’re in her thoughts and you can understand what this moment means to her. When she is standing in the water in her head she says “Here, then , is the last moment of true  perception (5)” to some it would seem as though a delusional woman just walked into disgusting water with all of her clothes on, to another it may seemed as though a woman was just in deep thought and she just didn’t understand how she ended up in the water, but if you really knew her you’d know that this was a phase a phase that she wouldn’t be able to escape from, oh she’s been here before, but this time she isn’t strong enough to break out of this phase and this is her way of helping everyone be happy again. The woman in the water is just a blank picture and anyone could make a story on she ended up there. Then it feels as though you are being yanked and you’re at Virginia’s house where her husband, Leonard, has just gotten home and the maid tells him that his wife has gone out and he doesn’t even realize that he is never going to see her again until he sees the note. The note that he will be happier without her and she was the happiest she had been when she was with him, he runs out the house and that is the end of the prologue and the chapter starts. And you wonder about how Virginia got there in the first place and what happens to Leonard. It’s weird the Cunningham opens the book with a suicide.

For faith??

“Faith” is a fine invention

"Faith" is a fine invention
When Gentlemen can see—
But Microscopes are prudent
In an Emergency. 

Emily Dickinson

In “’Faith’ is a fine invention,” Emily Dickinson explores the vulnerability of faith through the more tangible aspect of man and invention.

Faith is the idea of believing in something that is not necessarily tangible but rather an idea or concept that will help pull through or deal with a situation. Dickinson describes faith as a “fine invention” suggesting that it could be a tactic that “Gentlemen” create when they see that things aren’t exactly going the way they should “in an Emergency”.  Faith becomes a fine invention when men are able to see where they are in a situation but then Dickinson cuts the sentence showing an unfinished thought which produces the questions of what it is that faith helps the gentleman see. The microscopes seem to take a higher rank than faith. Microscopes serve as invention for finer analyzing.Dickinson contrasts the microscope and faith, where “microscopes are prudent” meaning that they can be more careful or precise in predicting the future and that faith isn’t given the choice between the two in an emergency.  In the poem, “Gentleman”, “Microscopes” and “Emergency” are all capitalized showing a sense of importance of an Emergency where Gentleman must use a Microscope to better predict the outcome of the emergency, because faith alone will not help in seeing the future of the emergency but just the belief that they will make it through the emergency, but then how can a microscope really help in a emergency? Microscopes would easily be thrown aside in the time of an emergency rather than faith, but the poem suggests that microscopes are at a higher standard than faith. Dickinson questions what the Gentleman will use in an emergency will they use microscopes, which symbolize fact or practicality or faith a conjured concept when they can see that they will make it through. The first line shows a sense of vulnerability. “Faith is a fine invention,” faith is not only a belief that something will happen but also the vulnerability in the belief that something has to happen. When the Gentleman can see, faith becomes a fine invention, when Gentleman, proper, dignified men, are vulnerable faith is a “good, just, or a good choice” for an invention. Structurally it is interesting that that the second line doesn’t come before the first, so that it was “When Gentleman can see-/ “Faith is a fine invention” to show that when Gentleman are no longer blind and everything is clear and they have become more knowledgeable, that faith is a good virtue to have. For the last two lines it is interesting that Dickinson says, “But Microscopes are prudent/ in an Emergency” rather than, “but in an Emergency/ Microscopes are prudent.” The structure of the poem Dickinson’s way, sets the tone of endearing saying that when the men have become more knowledgeable that faith is clearer and allows more focus but then the tone shifts to  a more knowledgeable, superior , knowing tone when she says that in an emergency, microscopes are more helpful as if they have discovered through personal experience.

And we're back :)

I love poetry. I think it’s the best form of expressional writing. There is so much that you can get from poetry and the best thing about it is that the writer doesn’t have a specific meaning. The meaning of the poem is left up to the interpretation of the reader. You can get so much out of poetry. “Poetry is the universal language which the heart holds with nature and itself” – WilliamHazlitt. Poetry is universal, it transcends across the world. Anyone can read a poem, a sonnet, a villanelle, or a free verse and interpret it however they want and make it personal for them. Poetry connects us and intertwines us all to not just each other but to nature and the world around us. The purpose of poetry is to convey an important life moment that could either is insignificant or a very big moment like graduation, or being potty trained or your first day of college, but the moments are all things that everyone can relate too. It’s as if in the entire poetry library has poetry that is specific to everyone; every feeling and every moment you can connect with. “Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese” – G.K. Chesterton. I think what Chesterton is trying to say here is that poets will talk about almost anything. The corner of every topic and moment in life turned. Cheese represents the simple, basic topics that poets don’t talk and it almost doesn’t make sense that the all the complicated events or dark topics, or the life changing moments they talk about but very basic things they don’t talk about. Mary Oliver talked about walking through a swamp; it makes you wonder just how many people can really relate to that? How many people have walked through a swamp other than the people who live in the Everglades? Something so basic like food, which satisfies our physiological needs and won’t allow us to do anything else until those needs are met, is very interesting. Poetry kind of reminds me of short stories, in the way that we look at the meaning and the angle at which you interpret it. Both and poetry has a meaning that the author or poet had in mind when they were writing the work, but the meaning that you and I have when reading the work is not only different between the two of us but also the poet or writer. The difference that short stories have from poetry is the meaning is more solid in short stories. There is still interpretation but you’re more guessing of what happens next or what happens first, depending on how it is written, but you’re mainly focusing on sequence because the meaning is clearer. On the other hand poetry is more informal and it’s the meaning that is left to interpretation. The reader could ultimately discover a completely different poem with the same words that the poet uses. The similarity between the two is that there is a lot of reading in between the lines with both.

He's only a tad bit innocent

I'm almost a little parts of me that wants to dislike Grendel because he is in fact a monster but then the other half is sad for him because he is just trying to fit in with the men so that maybe hell be apart of something. Grendel is obviously a monster who is not apart of the human world but rather threatens thems and terrorizes them. There was the time where he got his foot caught in between to the two tree trunks and that was where he first discovered man. In discovering man he seems that they and him are not that much different from each other in that they both speak the same language. What I'm confused about is whether or not Grendel is actually talking. We are reading his thoughts but we haven't actually heard hi, communicate. In the beginning when his foot gets stuck he tries to talk to them but they don't understand him or that he is trying it attack them or when he sees the dead man outside and he picks him up and throws him over his shoulder and runs into the meadhall and yells out" Mercy!Peace! Friend!" hes almost trying to ask for their forgivensee trying to connect with them but theynrejct him and think thatbhe is trying to attsck them.So then you begin to think that the whole story is just his thoughts, he has told us that he speaks the same language as the humans but then at the same time when he has tried to communicate with them it's not the same language . It is possible that he could just speak like his mother (she is always saying drool , drool) but thinks like the humans do. Which would make his mind very sophisticated. Then what confuses me even more is that when he is hiding in the forest and he talks about how Hrothgar has violence and shame etched into his face and Unferth is asleep but guarding the meadhall and he is just watching them then someone in the forest is asking who is there and he says " the Destroyer" it seems as if the priest can understand him and he can understand what Grendel is saying to him which makes no sense to me. I don't think that Grendel is necessarily evil, I think that he , like Adam and eve , has been influenced by evil to embrace his evil side. The evil side we all posess but must be pressured so that it comes out because before he was curious at the world and angry that was why he was attacking the meadhall but then he comes into his role after talking to the dragon and becomes "the Destroyer"

The red sweater

 For the prose timed writing essay that we had to write about the short story, Eleven. Elevwn is about a little girl in class who is unable to communicate with her teacher that a lost sweater isn’t hers. The sweater is really ugly and smells funny and the teacher is quite certain that it is hers until she is told otherwise. In the beginning the girl is reflective in that she thinks that as people age we don’t know the difference in each year as we get a little older. She goes on to mention how she is turning eleven but she doesn’t feel eleven. She also describes how even though we get older we still repeat actions from the years younger. She compares aging with an onion or the rings of a tree. Ad we grow older we start off in the very center of the tree and then we make our way outward but then an event or test will stop us from continuing outward and moving on to the next ring, but will in fact make us revert to the ring that we have already passed. Then the teacher comes to her table and tells her that the sweater is hers and the narrator says how because the teacher is older and she is only eleven that the teacher must be very wise. This goes along with the idea that as you do get older you are creating more rings on the tree, that represents your growth in age, but also provides more opportunity for you to revert back into your childhood. I looked at this prose through the prospective that this was an internal battle between maturity and childhood. The girl was trying to find her way to maturity by it being her birthday she figured that because there were no physical changes she would just have adult- like actions. This was  a failed test on her journey to maturity because the  red sweater was the test to prove that she would be able to handle the situation in a adult matter and continue on her journey to adulthood and have less moments where she would revert back into her childhood . The red sweater isn’t just a red sweater but it symbolizes the test that could potentially stop us from maturing. Once we have passed our red sweater then we may continue to explore the world while being on the road to maturity. Because the girl, whose name I think might be Rachel, failed the red sweater test and cried she had regressed back into her childhood making it seem that the journey of her maturity was almost nonexistent. She went back to the time where she was three and sat and cried in front of her class. So now she must start over and prep herself to find the road to maturity and begin again. This ending shows that when we, as people, fail our red sweater test we must start over again , kind of like going from that childhood moment and starting again.